Now

If ever once there is a time when life feels right
And just, and simple, and lovely
That time is now

So many have mouthed the words
For writers before me have scribbled my thoughts down on paper
They are the ones who stole my senses for descriptions
And yet have let my heart rejoice in love through lines I could not muster on my own
Because I have seen His power at work
Right before my eyes, in my own hand
In his own struggles
In everyone's trials
It's hard to escape the facts when they are staring silently back at you
Looking through the black pupils, colored irises of light, through the white, through the vessels and blood and empty sockets
Into another time and place where your soul exists
Since it is not touchable, of course

Yet, I can feel someone,
something
embracing what is there
Adding to it.
This is when you know that the stars were placed with purpose
And the seas were leaked in anger
And planets are only a mere speck
So my desire for one peck is so incredibly irrelevent. Microscopic.
Did you know that?

Before I go to wander in my dreams, I say a prayer of thanks
And then unwillingly fall surrender to fatigue.
Once reality has become better than one's dreams, that is pure joy
That is the life I wish to forever lead until my time
But how could this be?
Happiness is only known because of pain
So when will the hurt grip my insides again?
When will the twisting and turning return for sleepless nights?
Showing teeth because that's all I've ever done. That's all I can do when I look into the truthful innocent faces
Until I am able to run and lock the door and in the night to cry a wimper, hopeless
Even when I know I knew it from the start
God is my shepard

But let us not keep our minds discouraged because this is goodness
I am free, dizzy, and light and exhausted with laughter
My hands are open and will not kill all these flawless moments with doubt
I will ask for the blessing to continue and wash intentions clean
We have another on our side
All that has happened has reason and gifts
Living water and a Sun to watch us grow apart into together
I only pray this light will last forever